stop bullshiting ppl, n mreova, stop bullshittin urself

its bn raining n windy l8ly, n lots r miserable, 'specially in dat dingy cafe i happen 2 wrk. on top of dat, ppl's relationship r fallin apart left n rite. sum1's desper8 enuff 2 enter a competition "three strangers and a wedding" . da name sez all. bt den agen, shuld ne1 b surprised frm a sgl thirty-sumthin romantic sorta girl? o yeah, lets nt mention dat she also sed, n i quote, "i don't believe it (love) exists." nw hw many tyms hv i heard dat? it's bcomin rly cliche. i c it evry day, n its wavin wildly n madly in front of ppl evry damn sgl day, bt since im still immature as far as life goes (or so i'm often tld, verbally n non-verbally), i guess i wont no wuld i??
i prob sound lyk i care despite all dat harshness. truth is, i do care, bcuz i'm da 1 hvin 2 listen 2 dis sort of bullshit evry 2nd dae. nw who wuldnt start carin if dey had 2 put up wif dat? fact is, its so fake dat i care, bcuz rly, i dun care. i try my best 2 solve problems, make observations n state dem, bt i'v neva given advice, which also stems frm da fact dat i dun care. i'm jst a dot amongst a mass of other dots, mostly n it's nt lyk im a dif colour of dif shape, n dis goes wif a lot of ppl i know, so does it rly matter wat one dot amongst a mass of other dots r doin??? nope, we jst live our own lives, n die thinkin dat we've lived it well. if dea's aftalife u can luk bak n go i spent my life well n if dea isnt, well, shame on u 4 wastin tym tryna save da world. im nt sayin 2 b completely cold, bt dea's only so many tyms u can say, 'i dun believe in love', especially wen u'v bn happy 4 mre than once in ur life cuz u no ur loved. come on, leave those sentences 4 those who've neva eva bn out wif ne1 n prob deserves sum1 jst as much as u do.

bah, finally got dat out of my head...

so, nw, im jst gunna go hm n study so i don't get sidetracked so easily. dea's nuffin 2 do hea... well, actually, dea is, bt i cant do it cuz i dun hv my stuff, n i wanna gt out of hea nw i dun wanna b carryin a 5kg/11lb bag at midnite walkin 2 weaeva.

i don't think. but other people do...

well, so it was bak 2 nada 6 wks of no-life, depressed, stressed out, full on panda eyes bullshit jst about evry1 lucky enuff pay mre lucky ppl 2 do. funny thing is none of wat i wrote above is tru. w8, i take dat bak. xcept 4 da no-life part, none of it is tru. yes, i hv assignments, n yes, iv got a test coming up, bt i feel pretty indifferent 2 it.
was readin my journal d ada day n was shocked as 2 hw lil i think bout ada ppl who care 4 me most, mainly my fam, n hw much h8 i had 4 sum ppl. it was quite shockin rly. i didnt fink i was capable, bt da journal of my past proved me wrng.
i hvn't talked 2 ne of my friends in 4 5 days nw. bt den i saw my tipsy friend 2dae (i'm prb gunna gt jumped wen u c dis) n evn nw im still kewl, calm, n collected. bt den agen, i hv quite often bn lyk dat, coz else i wuldn't rememba all da gud tyms i had wen i go totally hi on suga n jst used up my energy n used dat as n excuse 2 cover up my total uncarin nature. its sad, rly, bt wen a dreamer has seen 2 much of reality, dea's nt rly much of a place dey belong. hence, a lost soul.